What do
you do with your upset? When he or she offends you, what do
you do? Do you make your upset about them? Do you want to address
what they did or said? Or...or do you choose to listen, to consider,
to acknowledge and "own" your upset. Do you choose
to focus on what they did or said OR on what it is inside of
you that's plucked?
One's a
dead-ending battle, the other holds power.
THAT'S the
power & the purpose of upset...to show you YOU.
The biggest
waste of time for me is spent on "what she said" or
"what he did" or "what they shouldn't have done".
Dead! Feels very heavy. No movement, no energy there.
We
tend to push our upset away. We don't want to feel it. It's
unpleasant. It...it...it hits too close to home. Ahh, now we're
getting to the truth. And please remember that the TRUTH SETS
YOU FREE.
The truth
is, whatever emotion I fight to push
away is the
very emotion I must welcome in and have tea with. If I don't...IT
OWNS ME! For it's that emotion, that anger, that uneasiness
inside me that holds the key to the door to my peace and joy
and love! Ironically at the same time, my ignoring that emotion
inside me keeps the darn door locked! As I FIGHT OFF my upset,
I'm literally fighting off my teacher
that's persistently trying to advance me to the better life
(and will continue knocking on the door I've locked).
So tell
me, how do you fight off your upset? What's
your usual method? Do you pin it on someone else? Do you make
light of it or devalue it? Do you pick up your chin and "get
over it"? It all may work for a short while until it revisits
you around the next corner.
Let's
talk RELATIONSHIPS. How do you define a HAPPY relationship?
As one void of upset?
Gosh,
if we can just keep everyone from being upset, then
we'll be happy, right?
Nothing's
further from the truth. When I continually chase upset out the
door I'm also chasing with it the intimacy I'm trying so hard
to create.
Avoiding
upset in order to be happy
stages a disaster waiting to happen.
Upset is
like the yeast in the bread. It may not be the most delicious
thing you ever put in your mouth, but the bread won't rise without
it!
Have
you ever thrown a party and then locked all the doors so the
guests can't come in? That's what I do with upset! I actually
invite it. I seek it out. I incite it and provoke it. Unknowingly
of course. Why? My soul knows what it needs to heal. To grow.
To expose that part of myself that needs exposing so I can
reveal, deal & heal. My soul knows what's needed to be
whole. Never underestimate our God-breathed soul!
And so I
set up external factors that will stir my innards (that
will upset me). But then I consciously don’t like
to feel upset and so I either avoid
it or I dish
it off…usually onto someone else!
Here's
some fuel for ya... Brussel Sprouts
aint bad! They just taste funny. But man are they packed with
vitamins!
Upsets
aint bad! We squirm to get out of experiencing them like a kid
in the dentist's chair.
STOP.
FEEL.
It's critical
that you give your upset the right
to exist. It does anyway, like it or not. And your denying
it has only kept it returning while keeping you bunched.
My friend,
your upset is on your side. Recognize this and begin allowing
it to do its magic. Magic? You bet! Just like the doctor tells
you that the pain in your stomach is from the bad fish you ate
last night, your upset is trying to tell you some valuable information
as well.
Stop. Breathe.
Give your upset permission to be. Retire just this time from
denying
it, selling it, assigning it or explaining it away! The
boogieman
that's hiding behind it isn't as big and ugly as you think
he is, I promise. Listen to it. See what it's telling you about
YOU.
Here's an
astounding piece of gold I'm gonna give you about upset.
What
you're upset about
isn't really what you're upset about!
And your
believing that it is keeps you barking up the wrong tree in
life. Wait, this is too good. Let's give this another page.
the
very emotion I must welcome in and have tea with. If I don't...IT
OWNS ME! For it's that emotion, that anger, that uneasiness
inside me that holds the key to the door to my peace and joy
and love! Ironically at the same time, my ignoring that emotion
inside me keeps the darn door locked! As I FIGHT OFF my upset,
I'm literally fighting off my 
Upsets
aint bad! We squirm to get out of experiencing them like a kid
in the dentist's chair.