Life
is indeed a journey back to yourself. It's a process of becoming
OK with YOU. And the more OK you become with yourself, it
becomes clearer how backwards
we've been doing life!
The
more OK I become with me, the easier it is to accept
who you are. I no longer expect (a polite term for demand)
you to be what I need for you to be in order for me to feel
OK about myself. I bring my own joy to the relationship. And
so therefore when I don't need for you to provide any part of
my joy, I am free to just relax and appreciate you...ALL of
you rather than just those parts that keep me feeling supported.
Otherwise I tend to resist you and what you're doing and saying.
My capacity to love you is directly correlated to
my choice to Love myself.
And so without my own self-love present, I cannot unconditionally
& wholly love you, as my love for you would rely on what
you can do for me.
My
friends this is HUGE. This has completely revolutionized my
experience of love, and so it merits a bit more time spent.
I want you to experience the miracles
of love!
"Yeah
but, if I love myself so much, why do I even need a woman or
a man in my life?"
Loving
myself SETS ME FREE to love you like I've never loved before.
I remember when I got angry at my mate for one thing or another.
It really doesn't matter what it was...it was all born from
the same turnip patch. It was all from my need for her to do
or be something different than she was doing or being. I look
back and think, whoa, what an arrogant stance I took! How haughty
of me to get angry at her! I may as well have just shouted,
"when are you going to start doing your life MY WAY!"
When
I'm NOT in love with me,
I’m then spending my entire life trying to make others
be in love with me! And then oh boy, in march the demands and
expectations and subsequent frustrations and resentment.
"What
in tarnation is this jaybird talkin' about, in love
with myself? I was taught that it just aint right! It's downright
selfish & ugly"!
Here,
let's use a different choice of words. How 'bout self-respect.
Is that easier to wrap your fingers around? It's all the same...holding
yourself as one with high value or utmost respect.
Think
about the one person in your life whom you love and respect
the most. Not the one you pity or feel obligated to love. I'm
talking about the one you want to spend your time with...the
one whom you just really admire. I'll betcha that one person
projects self-respect, dignity, and an OK-ness with who they
are, am I right?
When
I love myself, I don't have to hold
back on you for fear that you won't like me. My OK-ness
with myself literally lessens the importance of how you view
me. Make sense? Of course I care about how you view me, but
when I'm not unconsciously fearing your view of me, then I'm
set free to just let go & BE ME!
Yep,
that's a biggy...
WHEN
I LOVE ME,
I'M FREE TO BE
WHO I AM.
When
I provide my own OK-ness, I then don't need for you
to provide it for me. And so I don't have to do things (manipulate)
to insure that you'll provide it to me...I'm free to BE ME without
holding back out of fear. WHOA! This is POWERFUL LIFE STUFF!
